Hello all! So I'm back into the latino world for the next couple of days. this is a particularly hard email to write. i don't know how to describe the past 2 weeks. the basics first. i've been in my site, a tiny indiginous village deep in a valley at the base of huge rainforested mountains. beautiful. utterly amazing. no electricity, and sometimes running water. i am slowly learning to speak the language, but for the meantime, spanish works with most people (except alot of the women unfortunately don't do spanish so much). so...where to start. i will try to be super positive, but coming fresh out of the hardest 2 weeks i've had in a long time, i'm full of venting. it's been ridiculously hard. very very hard. basically, the people are all very excited to have me, and i am treated very well. the poverty in this site is higher than any i have ever seen. malnourished, sickness no education, no food, but beautiful happy and hopeful people who are just in and out great.
so the hard things: the new ways of life. my daily life has no resemblance to my daily life at home. none. okay, some things. i go to the bathroom, i eat, i bathe, but how i do each of those things is very different and incredibly difficult. everything from sleeping to walking to having a conversation is incredibly stressful and hard, and i haven't had a single moment to myself where i am alone for 2 weeks. this is also very hard. i'm sure that once i get used to the change in lifestyle, things will be great. and with a little more time, the beautiful and insightful moments will turn all the difficulties into nothings...this will happen...soon. i hope.
to get in and out of my site i walk about 2-4 hours, depending on if there is a brave car halfway through the walk. otherwise it's shin deep thick juicy red mud that suctions my feet deep down. i've been walking around for 2 straight weeks in huge rubber boots. they don't leave my feet unles i'm inside my host family's house. and then they are just plain muddy. wet and muddy inside and out. foot funguses abound all over. the sight is green green green. lots of rainforest that has been slightly deforested, but not enough that you can tell from looking casually. penca roofs, all the houses are on raised stilts and are wood planks that the whole family (generally 11-15 people) wll all slee on. some of the planks have some what closed areas to hide the sleeping people from the world, but many do not. just open to the world.kitchens are outside, and consist of camping style open fires.
i live with a family for now, and will be living with another famiy in the next month and then in the meantime, i will be helping an old house back to life. it just needs some redoing so that it is safe to live in. so it doesn't crash when the wind blows, things like that. i'm excited to eventually have my own place. i love my family, all 11 of them, but there is no down time, as i said. i pasear all day long. meaning i go from house to house and sit and talk with people for an hour or so and we try to have a fruitful conversation. this doesn't happen easily in ngabe land. conversation is unlike any other. long several minute pauses are normal. and then there are floods of descriptions of life and fables and stories in more detail than a dickenson novel. this is beaucause all their stories are oral, so it takes forever. interesting, but when i have to pee and the story is going on and on, it's painful. i love it and wish that i could record the stories. not all people tell s! tories though. most people want to know everything there is to know about my family. names, ages, what they look like, what they do, how many kids each person has, why i don't have kids, why aren't i married, etc. (if the 15 year olds all have kids, why don't i? an interesting conversation to have with them) pasearing is totally exhausting. other days i have worked with the women's group of artists. this is an amazing experience. a co-op of uber powerful women who make the most beautiful hand woven bags. i will bring some home with me for sure. they are made totally out of natural fibers and roots and dyes. these bags, called chacaras, take about 3 months to make just one. i'm learning how to do it from step one: cutting the leaves, taking off the spines, defibering it (leaning the leaves against a huge log and rubbing bamboo up and down the leaf until i can peel little white string fibers on the inside off. this is sooooo hard to do and the whole body aches afterwards. this takes all day.) then just as i thought i was done, we go down to teh river and smack the leaves against the rocks until they are white. then we will dye the fibers, and then rub them against our thighs until they are threads. then it's time to sew for the next 2 months. yes. intense looking at farms, riding boats that are made out of dugout logs, one kid steering with a long pole another madly scooping the water out with a rubber boot. i will probably not start any serious projects for another month. my goal is just to work on things that are already going on and get to know people. but man o man it's hard.
interactions with people are totally void of all emotional connection. they don't show emotions. interactions are just...very cool. no physical touch, no real connection of how are yous and how do i feel and relaly an interest in my personal being. not too much of that. soo...i dunno. comming out of my site and seeing my volunteer friends is one of the most releaving things possible. i basically just hug them for full on minutes and we scream and jump around. familiar human contact.it's hard. it's going to be beautiful, but man oh man, it's hard. i don't know how to explain anything.
okay, i will try writing a bit later. i will try to explain myself better.
please write to me everyone. letters should be sent to yet another new
address:
Dana Perls
(removed)
Republica de Panama
Sweet!! letters sent to panama city are also very good. letters, beeps, the
works.
you all rock.
i lvoe you all. happy winter solstice and chanuka and christmas and happy new
years! i'll be spending the next couple days on the beach with peace corps
buddies. should be a good break. send my love to the world.
love you all!!!
dana